


I fucking hate that I love you

by Jenny69



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Cheerleader Clarke, Closeted Character, Confused Lexa, Drunk Clarke, F/F, High School, Love/Hate, Nerd Lexa, Sassy Lexa, Secret Relationship, Truth or Dare
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-09
Packaged: 2018-08-07 11:28:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7713283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jenny69/pseuds/Jenny69
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is a bitch that plays with Lexa's feelings, Lexa is not sure if to love or to hate her 'cause damn kissing Clarke is so good but she is so abusive , what if she just told everyone what is going on between the both of them when nobodies watching, she doesn't think that anyone would believe her , she doesn't even believe it herself.The whole shit began after a game of truth or dare at a party .</p><p>It's my first fanfiction give it a shot lol sorry for the mistakes, i'm open for all ideas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Clarke Griffen , do I have to say more ? popular cheerleader ,painfully atractive, a god damn artist ,jesus christ is there something she isn't good at ...well there is one thing: being a decent human, she is a fucking cold ass bitch ,,a cold ass Bitch ? Lexa why would you say something like that " well firstly I have to add that her ass not only is cold but hot what normally isn't possible , but Clarke isn't the norm ,in that aspekt at least, other than that she is just a basic mean white girl who drinks her coffee at starbucks (like fuck you how can you fucking afford 5 dollars for a coffee ), goes shopping with the credit card of her parents and is harrassing people like me. So how am i related to named Clarke Griffen , well all the really fucked up shit started when Anya forced me to go to a party...

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,, Pleasseee Lexa , I swear it won't be so bad , you never go out of house and watching documentaries isn't the same thing as doing stuff in real life , besides that when was the last time you got laid since Costia ?'' ,,Could you please get your face out of my cereal Anya ?" Anya is sitting in a really weird and uncomfortable position to make eye contact with the sassy teenager which Lexa unsucessfully tries to avoid since that is one of her weak spots. Anya keeps the eye contact well knowing that her hair is in the soymilk of Lexas cereal.

After a while of strong gazes from both sides Lexa lets go of the spoon and signs ,, Ok ok I'll go, but you stop mentioning my ex girlfriend ,also why the fuck can't you just worry about your own lovelife ?" Anya already cleaned up her hair with a towel and is now sitting on the counter eating an apple." As you know Raven and I are really happy and there isn't a thing I should worry about " Anya replies chewing. " unfortunately yes, I hear your happiness to often which is also one thing I wanted to talk with you about ,you know as hard as it is to believe but sometimes I have to sleep" ,, I won't apologies for my feelings" Anya answers earning an eyeroll from her sister. ,, You know that I only want the best for you . I love you ! As a sister, no homo ." Lexa giggles over the stupid joke of the blonde ,,now lets get dressed " Anya adds wiggiling her eyebrows ,, what do you mean i'm already dressed " Lexa looks down to take a look at her outfit , a Flannel ,how fitting she thinks to herself , she should also wear a beanie just to make sure everyone gets it, other than the fact that she looks very gay she finds her outfit to be fitting for the occasion,, Anya I really hope this won't be a stereotypical make over thing , 'cause it took me to long to accept myself just to wear something so I fit in in society standarts." Anya breaks out in laughter ,, Geez chill Lexa stop being so extra , I meant get on your jacket and shoes , we're heading out". ,, Sorry ,maybe I really need some social contact ". ,, Nothing to worry about ,let's go womanizer, I drive ".  
....  
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"Are you sure we should go inside , I already can smel and hear the drunk horny students". ,, Come on Lex , Don't worry Lincoln and Raven will be there." ,, Okay , let's get this over with " Lexa says as she takes a deep breath before she enters the expensive looking house, she isn't entirely sure who's party that even is, she just knows that Raven invited them to go. The first thing she sees is a dizzy Lincoln who not a second ago spoke with a girl she recognizes as one of Clarkes sluts : Octavia ,, Hi Lexi Pexi , glad you and your sis came " Lincoln pulls both of them into a tight hug , he smels like alcohol and expensive aftershave. ,,we have to get you something to drink, RAVEEEN YOUR GIRLFRIEEEND IS HERE GET THEM DRINKKKSS" Anya starts giggeling over Lincolns drunk behaviour,, Lincoln sweety I dont think she hears... nevermind , Hi beautiful I missed you". Raven gives Lexa both drinks and starts kissing her Girlfriend.  
Lincoln giggles and turns to Lexa ,, since they are occupied you should come with us , some people play truth or dare in the other room ". Lincoln is Lexa's best friend since kindergarten , she is happy to have such a good friend. ,, I would like to Linc but you sure they want me there?" . ,, They would be stupid if not "  
Lexa still has both drinks in her hands a she enters the room ,but she doesn't think she will drink today. The room isn't as loud as the rest of the house ,a few dim lamps lighten the room. Lexa scans the Faces ..... NO ...oh hell no , Lexa downs one of her drinks.  
There she is looking unfairly hot , her high school bully Clarke Griffen.


	2. Chapter 2

Fuck, fuck , fuck ,fuck... Lexa stands in the middle of the room thinking of an excuse to leave. ,, Lex take a seat next to me" Licoln says knowing Lexa good enough to notice that she is uncomfotable offering her a smile to calm her down ,, Guys this is Lexa , my best friend " Lincoln adds with a proud smile that makes the situation a whole lot better. everyone greets Lexa except of HER ,of course, why has she always has to be like that Lexa wonders trying to control herself. ,,I didn't know you were friends with Lincoln , to be honest I didn't know you have friends at all" Clarke says making Lexa angrier.

this statement may sounds inoccent to the other people in the room but lexa sees right throuh her and it makes her crazy. ,, Its nice that you think about me ,but there are a lot of things you don't know about me and happilly never will" Lexa answers.

The alcohol in Lexa's system and the long build up anger towards the blonde makes her decision easier ; she will play whatever kind of sick game Clarke's playin and she will win.

,,Alright , let's continue." Jasper says nervous trying to stop the tension that is building up between the two of them. ,,Okay, Monty truth or dare ? " Jasper aks with a cheeky smile ,,truth" he answers taking a sip from his unindentifiable drink ,,mhhhmm... if you had to be together with someone out of this group , who would it be ?" there seems to be more behind the question Lexa notices but she hasn't has time to think about it , she has her own problem ,Clarke, who is starring at her. Can't she just stop confusing her?           ,, I would of course be together with you " Monty says jokingly throwing a kiss , the crowd starts cheering and laughing, expect for Clarke, of course ,who still is not making a atempt to make her starring a bit less obvious. ,,Clarke, truth or dare?" the still flustered Monty asks.  
wow Lexa thinks Clarke actually stops starring and turns to answer ,,dare". ,,I dare you to kiss Octavia , with tongue for 1 minute". Lincoln seems to be happy about it , Lexa never understood why Boys are so into two girls kissing but as Clarke leans in and their lips touch she understands the fascination, fuck this is one of the hottest things Lexa saw in a while ,but the really fucked up fact about this situation is that Clarke keeps eye contact with Lexa, it's like she's trying to mock Lexa and since everyone knows that Lexa is a lesbian this can't be a coincidence.Is she trying to turn Lexa on? The only thing Lexa knows for sure is that she is really really turned on and that this is making her ashamed of herself.  
,,Girls you can stop now,the time was over like 1 minute ago" Bellamy says feeling uncomfortable seeing his sister making out with Clarke like that.

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After a while of laughter and awkward moments mostly consiting of Clarke making Lexa uncomfortable and the massage she had to give Murphy ,it's Clarke's turn again.     ,,Clarke ,truth or dare ?" Finn ,Clarkes boyfriend? (Lexa never really knows what is going on between them) asks. ,,Dare" she answers which makes Finn seemingly happy ,,I dare you to take a body shot out of Lexa". Clarke turns to Lexa ,,Ok but don't fall in Love with me , Lesbian"  ,,Nothing easier than that "the brunette answers ,,ouuuuuuhhhh burn" Lincoln says who was about to defned Lexa but since she can clearly handle the situation he decides not to.

They empty the desk on which snacks and alcohol were standing .shit, shit,shit Lexa thinks, she just wants to run away ,but she won't let Clarke win and she is to drunk and horny to be reasonable.

Clarke gets on top of Lexa and Lexa is cursing Clarke for not sitting a bit higher or lower , she definately does that purpose she thinks to herself. Clarke puts the lemon slice in Lexa's mouth, the liquer in her belly button and sprinkles the salt on her stomach as the brunette watches her.                                                      

Lexa thinks she is about to pass out when Clarke starts licking the salt, painfully slow ,off of her stomach ,after that Clarke makes a small pause just to suck out the liquer so strong that Lexa is sure that she left a hickey, she even goes that far that she licks circles around her belly button, the brunette tries with all her strenght not to moan . Finally she is about bite in the Lemon ,for what she has to move up a bit, the contact drives Lexa insane.As Clarke was about to bite in the lemon the brunette can't but notice how blue her eyes are....so blue- it hits her.                                                                                    

What the hell is she doing ,Lexa reminds herself that she can't do that with a person such as Clarke ,,get off of me" Lexa says angry ,,what ?" Clarke is surprised ,,I.Said.Get.Off.Of.Me." Clarke gets off and everyone watches Lexa leaving the room...


	3. Chapter 3

,,Oh my gosh , hahaha Clarke someone just got dumped".Murphy says amused while the blonde still stands dull in the room trying to understand what just happened, Clarke can't accept being treated like that, especially not from a loser like Lexa is. That little bitch . Clarke opens furiously the door and tries to make her way through the people to the bathroom , she is sure that Lexa is in there, it is one of the things Lexa always used to do , she is surprised that she still knows that. she bursts open the bathroom door and starts yelling ,, Who do you think you are ? You can't do shit like that with me" she screams getting a bit to close to Lexa.  
,,Clarke go the fuck away I can't handle you right now. What even happened to you ? Who the fuck did you become , I know you miss your father, let's just talk ." Lexa desparetely yells back. Clarke comes even closer so that Lexa can smell her parfume ,the blonde leans over and whispers in the brunettes ear ,,when you mention him again I will make you wish that you never were born." Lexa can feel the impact as Clarke slams her against the wall , the blonde pushes her body against the brunettes, Lexa doesn't has enough time to process what's happening as Clarke pulls her into a rough kiss , her lips taste like cherry and are probably the most soft thing Lexa ever touched with her own , the blonde starts sucking the brunettes neck leaving hickeys , Lexa needs to get in control again and tries to turn the blonde around but Clarke isn't willing to give up her power and pushes her against another wall . It gets steamier and Lexa lets out a moan that she wasn't able to stop anymore , then Clarke abruptly stops and their eyes lock once again , the blonde brushes away the blood from her lips ,that was caused by a to strong lipbite and leaves the bathroom.

 

Lexa is really fucking confused , what the hell just happened, she goes to the sink to refresh herself and notices that her lip is bleeding and that there are hickeys all over her neck. ,, fuck." 

 

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It's school again and Lexa made it through half of her classes without crossing ways with Clarke, what a archivement , she now is standing next to her locker telling Anya what happened that night. 

,,Oh my fucking god, oh geez Lexa this is intense. Why didn't you tell me that earlier ?" Anya is not sure how to feel about what her little sister just told her,, saturday and sunday you slept at Reyes's and I had to tell you in person, also I wanted to show you that " Lexa takes off her scarf and shows Anya her hickeys . ,,Ohhh, my little sister got some"  
,,pssst not that loud" the brunette says as she hides her hickeys again. ,, So what do you plan doing Womanizer?" Anya asks jokingly ,, I have no idea , I just gonna pretend that it never happened." ,, Lex ,just do what feels right to you, I could now say something ,,like follow your heart" but this would be to gay, even for me, I would love to speak more but I need to prepare my presentation I told you about." ,, Oh right I almost forgot, good luck Anya" the blonde gives Lexa a kiss on the cheek and leaves .

Now that Anya is gone Lexa get's nervous again , she can do it she just has to avoid....shit , Clarke walks down the hallway, leading her Sluts: Octavia and Maya . They always are in the middle of everyones attention , the boys want to be with them and the girls want to be like them ... ok the girls also want to be with them.  
Clarke and her sluts are walking in direction of Finn and Murphy but Clarke's attention seems to be somewhere else ,her ,,inconspicuous,, gazes make it pretty obivious. Lexa rolls her eyes as she sees Clarke kissing Finn a bit too enthustiastic to be genuine , why the hell is she doing that with Lexa , she is a fucking sadistic brat. Lexa slams her locker close ,puts on her headphones and since she now has free period she decides to go to the library .

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In the Library:

 

,,you're such a nerd" Lexa looks up from her book ,why is she not surprised seeing HER again, Jesus...


End file.
